Lonliness

Oh I KNOW... it's been a while!!! But with Baby Girl growing and almost here... I haven't had time to post. I'm not sure that anyone is keeping up on this anyway... but if nothing else... this blog sure helps ME to reflect. So what the heck!!

Lately poor Blaze Boy has not gotten the much deserved attention that he needs. The other day as I was shortly OFF bedrest I decided to march right in and give him some love... but HE FREAKED... and myHEART BROKE!!!!!!!! After patience and love and time within 5 minutes we had a haltar on and were starting to relax, but it just brought me to think about lonliness. I doesn't just affect horses does it?

Have you ever noticed during times of solitude how many LIES can be conjured up in your head... how many FEARS can develop and so on. Having contact with friends and family is so so important in order hear truth and understand that you have constant support. It doesn't take a horse long to convince himself everyone's out to get him... really... when left alone long enough... it doesn't take us too long to feel the same way! So today I encourage you to surround yourself with friends... and to BE a friend. And HUG your friends... so that such LOVE doesn't freak THEM out!!!!

How do YOU halter!?

Ok... yes... I'm really asking you're opinion here! As many of you know, I'm a rookie... so feel free to correct me where I'm wrong! I happily receive instruction! I just have to tell you about my honest haltering situation with Blaze. Which I know is my own fault.

So yesterday... I tried to merely go in the pasture and halter Blaze... we had been doing pretty good with this. But he was NOT interested at all yesterday and he would not pay attention to me... so (this is where you horse pros may think I'm stupid... but forgive me and teach me) I used the scare tactic to try to keep his interest and attention on me, thinking he needs to remember to not ignore me and that it's in his best interest to pay attention and join up with me. Well... at first we did pretty good with that.. until he started challenging me and rearing and charging... he got pretty annoyed... and little ol' pregnant me was not going to stand there and boss around a charging horse.. I know that is one of my first errors... he got MY feet to move... he won. But people after 5 years of trying to have a baby, a horse is not going to take it from me. Anyway... I was quite frustrated that NOTHING I tried could get him moving out after that... and noticing his nature... eyes wide, ears forward, licking and chewing... I knew I was seeing at least some willingness to pay attention. So I went back in with him and rubbed him down so he would realize I'm not just all about chasing him and yelling and as long as he is standing still and giving me full attention I will reward that... but once I got the halter out... the same show happened... only there was no scaring him off this time only bossiness on his end. So it's at this point... I'm sure some of you would know what I should have done next. Feel free to inform me! I don't have a round pen... only a big open pasture... and even if I did... there was no way to get him in one.

So here's where the God lesson comes in... I went and sat in the swing by the pond and just asked God to show me what was going on. I asked Him how He halters us... and even if he DOES halter us since he gives us free will.

He seemed to share this with me (but remember I am a mere human... I can mess up at hearing God I suppose... but this seemed like His wisdom)

When a horse has a halter on... it can still have free will. Ultimately you always want a horse to have "free will" and do things out of that free will in order to perform best. You don't want a broken spirited horse who has to do things... you want a free spirited horse who LOVES to do things. God sees it the same with us... he doesn't want us to be broken children working as his servants... He wants us to be free children serving Him because we want to! But yes, He does halter us... because He DOES want us to be His own and He wants to know we are willing to give Him that control.

So that was a good start... but next I asked God HOW He halters us.... God... when do You spook us or make us work to get our attention, and when do You naturally let us decide to come and put on the halter... I know You do it both ways because some people are stubborn and some aren't but You love them all and want them all to be Yours. So God.. HOW do YOU halter.

This is what I got.

God allows us to be spooked and worked in order to get us to come back to Him when we've walked away and yet, know better. And He doesn't allow us to be "spooked" to be mean... He does it out of protection and love... with a watchful eye, ready to pull us in, He says... go ahead... see if life is easier without Me. As trainers that's what we do to our horses.

God waits for some people to naturally accept the halter when they never knew better... the halter is new to them and it's kind of frightening. Giving up control, especially of one's head... can be scary, so for those dear children, He gives them time to warm up to it and speaks gently to them.

So, ok God.... I did the right thing then? Blaze knows better! But... what do You do when one of Your children that "knows better" starts challenging YOU and charging You and STILL does not want the halter?

He said...

I ask myself why.

That's all He said.

Ughh... ok.... so what do I do NOW. I asked myself why Blaze was doing this to me. Went and sat by the fence in the pasture. Let him walk up to me and muzzle me.

And I heard God say...

Do you see how bad he actually wants to be with you? If you're striving to be like me Hope... you need to be out here with Blaze more often. He loves you, but he doesn't know what to expect from and inconsistent god, an inconsistent trainer that doesn't have time for him. I am a consistant God, always having time for my children. You thought he should "Know Better" but really, it's been a while since you've spent quality time... he needed your time today.

OH HOW I HAVE BEEN HUMBLED!!! But isn't God so wise!? I love Him!

So we are rebuilding... good news... the halter is already on this morning! =)

Sermon On The Mount Pics

Hey! I'm finally posting pics from Sermon On The Mount!

My dear sweet horse, who had never been ridden before... was ridden within an hour.

Lew Sterrett is an amazing trainer and pastor. He did a sermon while training Blaze. His sermon was about how God wants His believers to WANT to be with Him and WANT to do what pleases Him instead of doing things for Him because they just should or feel like they have to.

Some horse trainers train their horses that way... they just MAKE them do the things they should, while Lew works with the horses heart.

I know... some of you are thinking blah blah blah... natural horsemanship, but that's not Lew.

He believes dealing with a horse's heart begins with encouraging a horse to do the right thing through their rear end and their hips... not tugging on their halter or bridal. His method seems to be an AMAZING balance of good ol' cowboy training mixed with understanding and patience.

With natural horsemanship, a trainer might wait FOREVER to let a horse decide to do something... but that doesn't really reflect our God either... God is not passive... but He is not cruel... He is bold and corrective and yet rewarding and loving, like we should be with our horses when training.

This sermon just made me really check my heart, am I following God because I want to, do I just read my Bible because as a Christian I HAVE to?? And how about my horse... am I training him the way God would train me? Good things to think on.

Hopefully you can see the sequence of things in the pics below. Lew first addressed the crowd, then began to get Blaze's attention by sending him off anytime he wouldn't pay attention to Lew (no whip involved). Once Blaze finally hooked on and wanted to be with Lew, Lew worked on putting the saddle blanket on. After Blaze accepted that, Lew put a lariat around Blaze's cinch area and pulled it tight... as you can see Blaze reared and bucked for a while. Once he accepted that, Lew put the saddle blanket on and then the saddle and Blaze accepted it well. Then Lew worked at slowly putting pressure on Blaze's back by standing in the stir ups, once Blaze accepted that... He got on his back and after a little time, he got Blaze to move forward. Now... it wasn't all just that easy... but that explains the sequence below.

SERMON ON THE MOUNT

IT"S ALMOST HERE!!! And you have to come and bring your friends!

Sermon on the Mount is an amazing ministry and it's coming to the Isabella County Fairgrounds from July 15-17 nightly 5:30-8:00. It's a free even and you will be able to watch WORLD RENOWNED horse training.

Lew Sterret will wow you with his horse training abilities while at the same time, giving a sermon that will relate to your relationship with God by comparing it to how he is working with the horse.

PLEASE pray for this ministry. They will be needing people to agree to come pray on site before and during the ministry. It you're interested please let me know!

This is a free event! Pray that people's lives will be changed by the preaching and teaching done by Lew and the horses. Blaze and I hope to see you there...

He Can Do It!!

Blaze's vet appointment went fine! All we dealt with was a little side step!
What a pro!

Poor Boy

Well my poor boy and his blog have been a little left behind in all the baby news... don't worry though... we won't let that continue.

Just a quick update...

Blaze is being considered for possible use in a ministry called "Sermon on the Mount"
(click on the Sermon on The Mount Link on this blog to research further)

This event will be run at

The Isabella County Fairgrounds
July 15,16 and 17
5:30-8:00 pm

It is a FREE event and a GREAT opportunity to watch some AWESOME horse training from world renown trainer, Lew Sterret.

So, there is no gaurantee he will use Blaze... but Blaze is one of seven horses being considered.

So Thursday... the vet comes out to do some vaccinating...

oh brother~! pray for us!!
I'll let you know how it goes!

Going Solo

I was so touched today as I listened to Charles Swindol and he referred to Philippians where Paul says to not let your enemies scare you and that will show the strength you have in God.

He mentioned that the word used for "scare" is the same word we would use for "spook". He talked about how a horse going into battle, back in the day, would at times shy away from battle when he heard the cannons in the distance. This was a problem since this huge muscular war horse would be turned into a meek mouse. HOWEVER... when the war horses were surrounded by each other they stirred each other's bravery and loved to fly into war together. Isn't that just like us!? When we go into hard times alone... we may tend to shy away, but when we face them with our brothers and sisters we stir each other's courage! I am so thankful for my fellow war horses....

Going Solo Just Isn't So Fun.

TRAINING PROGRESS...

Yesterday Blaze and I did some work together that I thought was a big breakthrough. To you who are familiar with the horse world... this will sound very elementary and it is something I should have done by now. I finally have a starting point and direction though... so now I am pushing forward.

Blaze and I had previously gotten to a point where he trusted me... I thought that was a huge breakthrough and in a sense it was, but now I realize I should have established respect first. Respect should always come before trust. I now see that. Blaze never respected my space and even knew he could push me around. We are going to work on that!!!

Yesterday, I first established my space with Blaze (the area around me that he was not allowed to enter unless I asked him too). He was slightly put out at first, but caught on quickly and enjoyed the praise once he got it right. Through this exercise alone I saw Blaze's attitude go from "I am getting really ticked that your not turning me out to graze!" to "Whoa... this is new... you've got my attention!" And as soon as he saw the release of pressure when he did something right he was a happy horse licking and chewing and showing me he was ready to work. Honestly... I know this is ridiculous... but I have never had him give me such a pleasant attitude and I was shocked how little it took to get it.

After we established boundaries I worked with being able to touch Blaze on nearly every part of his body with him being OK with it... and not only OK with it... but relaxed with it. I found between the ears and under the belly were naturally areas of resistance but I pressed on until he relaxed and then released pressure and he soon was easily allowing it. We started going in circles when I started working on his hind end. Usually when we get to this stage I back away or stop and reposition Blaze and try again. This time I stepped in unthreateningly but dominantly until he stopped spinning and then tried working on him again and he eventually was tired of going around and allowed me to touch him. After about 15 seconds of him standing still I rewarded with a release of pressure and then went into it again and this time we didn't even have to go around!

I was proud of Blaze even for standing still the entire time and for the most time not resisting me. And I am proud of me for being able to start stepping in and not backing away.

My God, My Farrier

As I look at my boy today. I just thank God for him. And for giving him to me at such a perfect season. He was heaven sent for sure. And something about this picture give me chills... I know Blaze is far from being an angel... but in a sense, he is an angel to me! He has brought me out of my shell and taught me about bravery and confidence. He has taught me how to defeat fear.

Today, Blaze had his hooves trimmed. Blaze fights this ALL the way. He hates it, and yet he merely hates it because he doesn't quite get it yet. He doesn't understand that what is happening is for his own good, not to harm him. If we could only explain that to him, things would go so much smoother. So we had to "get his attention". After Blaze was refocused he did fairly better.

I wonder how often God feels like a farrier?

Who IS bigger... the turkey or the horse?

DO you ever let turkeys frighten you?

Do you know that with God, you are bigger than the turkeys in your life? The turkeys would like you to believe that they are bigger than you can handle... and sometimes the turkeys are ignorant to the fact that you are much bigger, because you have God's Spirit within you! You are not in the pasture alone! Really.... the turkeys are smaller... relax.

The other day BLAZE realized there were turkeys in HIS pasture. For the longest time he couldn't get it past his head that the turkeys were not a threat. Eventually he got brave enough to walk halfway out to see what they were... but then... he spun around, ran and hid in his stable. About 30 minutes later he had apparently worked up the courage to go about 3/4 the way... but again spun around and hid. Again another hour later, Blaze ran out full force towards the turkeys, sending them flying. He still didn't wait around after defeating them, he turned and ran back to his stable once again. I was so proud of him for defeating his fear though! As I wondered why the turkeys were in Blaze's pasture for so long, I eventually realized the electric fence was keeping them in when I saw one get shocked... but once they saw Blaze charging, they could care less about getting shocked.

Isn't it just like the devil in OUR lives to keep the fear trapped in our lives? An electric fence around it to keep it close to us? But if we realize our size, our authority, that fear has to go no matter how the devil tries to taunt us with it.

Charge your fear today!!!

Ears Forward

My Eyes are fixed on you, O Sovereign Lord; in you I take refuge..." Psalm 141:8a

I borrow this story from a wonderful horse lady I met in church this Sunday. As we stood there chatting and getting to know each other we hashed over how amazing it is that God can use horses to speak so many rich analogies to us. Then this wonderful lady gave me an example of one lesson that God has taught her and her husband with their horses... and that's... Ears Forward

As many of you may know, when working with a horse, you want his attention to be on you, not meaninglessly wandering around looking at everything BUT you! You can tell where a horses TRUE attention is by the direction their ears are pointing. Of course wanting a horses complete attention is for your safety as well as the horses , but it is also a respect issue. If your horse does not respect you or even know you as it's trainer, you can try and try again and you're not going to get through very well. And still yet it goes beyond respect and it goes into being a relationship issue. You want your horse to pay attention to you and respect you, but you also want him to WANT to be around you, you want him to willingly look constantly to you for direction.

That is such a parallel to what God wants from us. In a sense God is our trainer! Really He is. And if we take our focus off Him we will get very little out of any type of relationship from Him and we will miss out on what His leadership has to offer. And yet, we can be "good" Christians and give Him our attention on Sundays or even now and then read our Bibles because we "should" but then we still don't look to Him WILLINGLY, wanting to be with Him and wanting to serve Him out of love.

What an awe inspiring thing it is however when you look at a horse that wants to be with its trainer out of pure love and adoration and a desire to serve and listen. It's rewarding to get to that point with a horse, it is an awesome trusting relationship. How great GOD must feel when we completely surrender to Him, not because we should, but because we want to.

Ears forward.

Stay tuned for my next entry..."Who is really bigger the turkey or the horse???" The Saga is unfolding in the pasture as we speak...I'll let you know who wins! Oh, I hope it's not the turkey! Make me proud Blaze!

Freedom

Have you ever noticed that in order to have complete freedom you need to completely stomp out and laugh in the face of the very thing keeping you captive?

(As I write that very fact, I just caught myself thinking "Ok... Well that's not quite true... if I were in prison and I stomped out or laughed at the gaurd I DOUBT freedom would be mine to have, yet... the only reason I would find myself in prison would be for preaching God's word where it's not allowed... and then I would hope that I could laugh in the face of the enemy knowing God would have victory... that would be freedom... spiritually and that's what matters most!) anyway...

Well, this week's work with Blaze brought back old memories from this time last year... only, what we are going through with him this time is not quite so severe. Earlier last week we got Blaze out of the pasture for the first time since the fall. I got him out and instantly he was spooked by things that were sitting out in our yard. He turned to face me, reached out with his front feet to try to get the lead rope loose form my grip and he kicked and bucked just a little. Rob immediately took him, realizing this was potentially dangerous. Rob walked him down the driveway and back to calm him down. I tried to walk along with them, but because of Blaze's spunk, they were walking too fast, I tried to give Rob some advice on how to reposition Blaze, but nothing was being communicated very well, and of course the devil was right there getting me to doubt myself, so I walked back to the house and let Blaze and Rob go off together. I felt like such a total failure.

When Rob came back he asked me if I wanted to work with Blaze. To be honest, I was still quite frightened from the way Blaze had reached out at me with his front hooves, and I wasn't quite ready to conquer this fear. So Rob and I let Blaze graze in the front yard for a while. Rob told me he really felt like I needed to go and take Blaze for a walk by myself to get over the fear and prove to myself that I could do it. I just said "no... not today" and sat back on the porch reading a book and ignoring what was right. Then God spoke to me through a hawk and some crows... (see recent post at http://krotzers.blogspot.com) and I KNEW I had to look past the fear and doom to experience true freedom, in life, and at that instance with Blaze. I went up to him and took a hold of his lead rope, asked Rob to go with me (he is an amazingly supportive, patient husband) and off we went for another walk.

Blaze started off pushy and with a little attitude, he really didn't want to leave the green grass he was munching on. Eventually, as we moved forward together, he pulled me along. I knew this wasn't optimal, Blaze shouldn't see himself as the leader, but rather the follower. So I stopped him and pushed him back to the right position slightly to the right side and a step behind me. I had to do this three times to get the message across to him, I was so happy that I had the guts to do it, it was frightening turning nearly face on with a disobedient horse and pushing against a muscle mass that is truely big enough to push his way right over top of ME if he wanted to. Blaze did pretty well the rest of the way down our 3/4 mile driveway and back. I was so proud of him. I worked on getting him to halt and he did great with that too! At one point I stood head to head with him and just loved him and he had a perfect compliant spirit.

Once we were back at the house, I brought Blaze up to the pond which he is terribly afraid of. I walked in with my rubber boots on and splashed around, and after a few minutes of sidestepping and snorting, Blaze walked right in too... without me forcing him. The way he "pawed" at the water before stepping in was a priceless thing to watch.

So not only did I feel freedom from my major fear, Blaze did too! A double victory!! And I am so glad God got the victory and not our fears!

Blaze had Visitors Yesterday

And he liked them A LOT! Miss Hannah, Miss Elizabeth, Miss Katie and Miss Linda!!!
Even Linda noticed how much better Blaze was doing. Last time she visited, Blaze was still jumpy. This time he nearly climbed over the fence to see the kids. It just did my heart so much good to see Blaze loving on kids!! He was gentle and inquisative. Even gave a few licks on Hannah and Elizabeth's coats... sorry mom... they will need to be washed.

Thanks so much for visiting girls! It was good for Blaze!!!

Blaze will have more visitors tomorrow since we're hosting Easter here! He's very excited!

Finally Face to Face

This might be one of my most exciting horse days ever... and it all merely happend in about 30 minutes!! It all started when I went out to feed Blaze this afternoon. I decided, after feeding Blaze, to brush and pet him. As I said in a previous post... he has SEEMINGLY gotten past his headshyness. This alone is amazing to me. So, I have tried to persistantly give him attention regarding his head to be sure to instill in him that he was right to give in and he CAN trust a person to touch his head. A couple days ago I started to work with Blaze to get him to obediently step forward when pressure is applied to his halter. The first day of working with him, it took about 20 minutes and after a little understanding he finally stepped forward. Seeing that stepping forward brought a release, he was quick to do it every time I tried from then on out. Even today as I walked up to his stall, I gently grabbed his halter and barely pulled it forward and he stepped forward like a pro. After he stepped forward I praised him and pet him. After petting him for a few minutes I realized he was (for the first time ever) lowering his head by his own choice while I was in close proximity to his head. The last few days I have been working on his mane and I have applied pressure behind his ears to get him to lower his head. Today... I didn't even have to ask, it was as if we finally had gotten to a place in our relationship where he wanted me to be around. You see, I had come up with a way to explain how the relationship between Blaze and I had been... I was like the middle school girl all giddy and in love with a boy... Blaze was the middle school boy, who while he may have been starting to be interested, really still just wanted to be a boy and really had no interest in the girl clamoring over him. Well... today... I think we finally fell in love.

As I was petting Blaze I put my forhead to his (something I HAD never ever done before for fear I would get knocked out by Blaze's sporatic fear based behavior). Blaze.... just stood there.... ears forward... eyes soft... and he soaked it in. I thought this was great, but I was certain Blaze had to be nervous... until I saw his soft eyes... eyes tell a lot about a horse's attitude (in my unprofessional opinion) and Blaze's eyes were certainly saying.... "I like this". You know I started crying... this was a breakthrough for both of us... I had gotten over my fear too... and on a windy day... when Blaze is usually at his worst!!!! Blaze has had his moments.... and this was one of the best!!

After all this I asked God what He wanted me to learn from this lesson. He told me that just as I had longed to be face to face with Blaze, He longs to be face to face with His children... even in the windy challenging times in our lives. And when we step forward from the gentle pressure applied, He certainly is there, face to face loving every minute of it, even more than I loved being face to face with Blaze... which I can't even imagine!!

"The Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend." Exodus 33:11

PERSISTANCE!!!

Blaze finally allowed me to put his halter back on... we have seemingly gotten past headshyness!! I have no idea if it really had anything to do with me, but... I have been persistantly giving him opportunity to walk into his halter... and one day (maybe this is cheating) I hung his halter over his water bucket... he really wanted a drink but knew I wouldn't allow it unless he let me put his halter on in the process... we tried this for (brace yourself) an hour and a half one day... and we did not succeed... our toes almost froze of instead... but I wouldn't give him the complete last word until he attempted to put his face in again. Then I praised him and released pressure for just the attempt, let him drink and gave him a little petting! The next day... we went through the entire routine, and only took about 3 minutes to get him in his halter. I think he realized I was persistant and he could either give in or go through the entire hour long ordeal again. Thankfully he made the right choice.

Persistance pays off they say, and it certainly did with Blaze this week! We are also praying it will with our adoptions. Please pray with us that God's lesson of persistance with Blaze this week... would be well reflected in our patience during this adoption! We will not give up... even if it does seem our toes are freezing off!!

Hopewell Ranch

I would love to introduce you all to Hopewell Ranch! One of the most wonderful places in the world I'm sure! I am hoping to volunteer my summer away at this awesome place. Check out their website under "Favorite Horse Ministries" at the left of my blog!

Give and Take

Well... I can tell I will be paying for my slack winter in the spring. I have to say, merely getting a halter on Blaze at the moment has been a challenge. He was walking right into his halter MOST times this summer... but not anymore. (Shame on me totally...) Well, Blaze is also headshy, so the fact he was doing so good this summer was awesome... but yesterday as I tried to get Blaze's halter on he would quickly move to bite the halter as to not let me pul it on... so after a while I decided if he was going to continue this... I would pull him toward me as he was biting and give his head a good workover to at least work on the headshyness. I can at least say I got somewhere with touching him on his head and he stopped biting his halter so much since he knew it just lead to me rubbing or scratching his head.


Doesn't this sound like what happens to us sometimes when God works in our lives? He would like to come to us and get us to accomplish one thing, but we resist and He finds another way to better us anyway. I'm so glad He does that instead of just giving up on us the first time we resist Him. I hope you can see God when He tries to work in your life. And if you have any clues on bettering the halter situation... feel free to share... I have a lot of growing and learning to do, I'm glad we at least got some growth out of our time together, but I certainly don't want to harm Blaze in my ignorance. Thank you God for continuing to give to us even when we take from you or resist the goodness you try to lay before us.

How the Mane Humbles Me

So some of you may be wondering about the Bible verse on the title of my blog? It's one of those verses that just might not quite hit you if you don't get the context. Well one day I just happened to be sulking and God prompted me to open up to the book of Job. You see... Job was sulking too (some may say he had legitimate reason to) and God was trying to show Job how wonderfully in control of things He is when the world seems to be spinning out of control from Job's (or our) perspective. So there I was sulking... since I just didn't seem to get some things going on in my life... and God basically brought me back to Him and the reality that HE sees the big picture... that HE is the one who created all things good. It wasn't ME who put the flowing mane on the horse... it was God. So I have peace in knowing GOD is in control and I lay my worries at the feet of the one who DOES see the big picture. A wonderful lesson God knew would touch the heart of a horse lover. Now when I see blazes beautiful mane when he runs around like crazy... I remember the One who put that mane there... and I praise Him.